Looking ahead || Autumn/Winter 2018

I've been falling in and out of love with my blog this year, I really thought that once I'd installed my new theme I'd keep up with posting regularly. I was so excited about blogging again. But it seems to have fallen by the wayside and that makes me really sad. Blogging was my lifeline when Martha was in Hospital, I don't want it to be a blog full of posts from when times are hard and for Martha to think we've only had a really tough life. I want it to be a journal of our everyday life and of the lovely memories we've made together.

We're coming up to the time of year which is full of some pretty tough anniversaries.

October 15th, 2015 - Martha's 4th Open Heart Surgery
November 14th, 2013 - Martha's 2nd Open Heart Surgery
November 17th, 2016 - Martha's 6th Open Heart Surgery
November 25th, 2013 - Martha had her Pacemaker Put in
November 26th, 2013 - Martha went into AF
November  12th, 2013 - Martha's 3r Open Heart Surgery

At the beginning of the week, it was Parents Evening at the girls' school. Their teachers said some lovely things about the two of them, gave me some hints and tips on things we can do at home to help them progress further and mostly reassured me that we're doing alright. I want the three of them to do well in school, I want them to be able to go further than I ever did and have careers and lives that I could never have dreamed of. But I get this nagging feeling that I might be asking too much for Martha. After everything we've put her through, shouldn't we just be grateful that she's still here and able to go to school every day? Are we asking too much of her to expect her to be reading, writing and doing maths like a little genius as well?

We are off to London on Monday and we are all feeling the anxiety this time around. Six months is a long time between appointments; it's amazing to be in a position where they are happy to only see her every six months. We talked ourselves down from the edge the other day by reasoning that if Dr. Starling would have been happy to go a year without seeing here if she didn't have her pacemaker, he obviously isn't expecting there to be much of a change in six months.

Once we get London out of the way on Monday we can start making plans for Christmas. I've been saving for Christmas since last November and I can't wait for our shopping trips, for hot chocolates after school and for arranging family visits. Since we missed Christmas 2013 I always make sure that I squeeze all the exciting build up that I can into December.

However, before Christmas, we have the October half-term and I'm lucky that this year I am off for the majority of the week. Mark is off on one of the days, my Mam is taking a day off with us and we have plans with friends on a couple of other days. As much as I love the Summer, Autumn has to be my favourite season. I love the not warm but not cold weather, going for walks and coming home to warm up with a hot drink, the lighting which makes photo's look so lovely (and the rosy-cheeked kids in the photo's).

So with a lot to look forward to (and a handful of tough anniversaries to make it through), I'm ploughing straight into the last quarter of the year and all it has to offer. I can't wait.


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